Grizel (Gid) Mary Grant

   Another name for Grizel was Robarts.

  General Notes:

Only 4 weeks before she died, Mum was still busy in her minute conservatory, taking cuttings and nurturing her treasured plants. She was crippled with arthritis, but with staunch support from Vaness and Tim as well as her neighbours and friends at The Playing Close, she had just about fended off having to move out of her own home during her 6 years there. She had settled down in Charlbury, even if she never could see the point of having access to a swimming pool - except as an extra attraction for the cherished grandchildren and great-grandchildren.

Latterly, gardening took up more and more of her time (building on the foundations laid gardening alongside Purr Robarts and Saul at Lillingstone during the War). Her gardens at Fellyard, South Park Mews and Charlbury were an enduring, sometimes frustrating but always absorbing pleasure, and showed what knowledge, determination and love could achieve. The associated bonfires at Slapton were legendary, and it was rare for any weekend visit to pass without some daunting project being planned and executed, culminating in a ceremonial immolation of the detritus. Woe betide any of our friends who thought coming to stay would be a restful, relaxing weekend with the papers.

Mum and Dad were married for 40 years, with inevitable ups and downs, but she always maintained that the first blissfully happy 25 years of fun and laughter balanced their more difficult later years together. Her family meant everything to her - the older she got the more she doted on us all, most especially her grandchildren and great-grandchildren.

Mum was a keen and knowledgeable bird spotter rather than proper bird watcher. On holidays in her later life, her companions were amazed that the birds took such precedence over the wild flowers. She was obsessively persistent in digging out sources for a quotation (maybe a relic of her time at Bletchley Park during the war?) - a Dictionary of Quotations and Hutchinsons Encyclopaedia ('the little red book') were always close at hand, to assist in completion of a variety of general knowledge crosswords. Even last Easter she was still doing the weekend Telegraph crossword, furious at her lack of recall of names and facts and still ringing up to check missing clues.

A recurring theme in the lovely letters we have had is her interest in everyone and everything. She was non-judgemental, both interested and interesting, and pretty much unshockable. She was always up for a new experience - from a 'difficult' opera, to a trip down a mountain on a snowplough, trips to Ethiopia, or hair-raising drives along the edge of a snowy precipice - nothing fazed her and she could make it all hilarious. She was astonishingly good at extracting entire family histories from anyone in no time at all - and not averse to having a quick session with Burkes or Debretts, if relevant, to sort out their genealogy and connections.

Many people will have received wise, often trenchant advice from Mum - she was outspoken to and about people, often rather sharp, particularly in later years, but she was fundamentally a really kind person, and an astute judge of character. She loved a good argument - and could be dogged and inflexible. Her family and friends could rely on her to support them to the hilt, regardless, in any situation. She claimed to be antisocial towards the end, but it couldn't have been further from the truth: she could make friends with anyone, anywhere.

Mum wasn't afraid of death, but she was terrified of being resuscitated to a half-life. She was in hospital for a week before she died; she was generally unaware of her surroundings although she knew those who were able to visit her and could join in the prayers being said for her. Many of her cherished family had the chance to say their goodbyes.

At her 90th birthday festivities at Balscote in April this year, Mikie and Laura arranged a huge bonfire for her around which we sat, discussing the benefits of a good funeral pyre - so we shall be having a ceremonial bonfire and fireworks in her honour this evening. Mum was such a positive person; she would not want us all to be miserable after her Requiem Mass. She is where she wanted to be, so now we must all dry our tears and go and get on with our lives, for our memories of an extraordinary woman who touched us all so deeply.

In Memoriam

Born Fordingbridge March 6 1914
School local Grammar school, v bright ("top of class all the time")
St Leonard's (pix in old albums) still top
V sporty played a lot of hockey
Jolly japes with brothers always talking about the boys John and Peter - ran wild at Burgate at Granny Coventry's house. Didn't talk so much about Janna and Liza. Not sure why they were with Granny rather than Mum and Dad.

Watermeadows, river, strictly forbidden so always there. - fell in and was rescued by John big bro.

After school (?) went to Brussels to learn French not sure how long.

London - met Dad
Liza will fill in about the young lovers but she said they weren't allowed to marry as Dad was too young to marry without Regiment permission
But this doesn't add up as Dad born 1910 and they married in 1936 - would have to check what the ages were - 26 seems v old to be under Army control?

Married Brompton Oratory July 23rd 1936 - another wedding just before and they shared the flowers - guests all got mixed up as knew each other.

Granny R either owned or 'took' house in Hill Street

Granny Grant took house for time before wedding - Mum modelled for top desnger Victor Stiebel (in V&A now) as it was quite the thing for posh totty to do at that date. Liza said he adored Mum's colouring and dressed her in outrageous colours. VVV Glam all told.

Went out to Egypt overland to meet up with Dad - through occupied France by train, and in flying boat across Med to Egypt. V perilous, and was taken under wing by a "little French man" on the train, who was all chivalry apparently.

Lived in Heliopolis - cocktails at Shepherd's Hotel (check Egypt stories with Pam Enderby) - rented house, servants all quite jolly I think - met Enderbys there and stayed lifelong friends. Support group of wives all in Cairo. Mum did VAD ? work nursing - taking shrapnel out of bums, etc. Clearly high fun levels and lots of laughs along the way

Dad in 11th Hussars Armoured cars, Khattara Depression, 2 pts of water a day for all drinking and washing - lifelong skill at getting vehicles out of mud/sand/snow. Dad played polo when on leave, but away long periods.

Back in England at Lillingston - need to find job (get out more?) recommended to Bletchley Park - always said she was just the telephonist but wouldn't discuss at all. However, she did know how the Enigma machines worked, and described to me how exciting it was to look at the transcription and realised they were making words in the groups of letters.

Only in 1970s discovered that M&L's friend James Harris Jones had been working there too - neither had ever told anyone. Even after 30 years wasn't happy talking about Beltchley Park.

Lillingstone - Nanny there with Julian Vanessa so prob no room for Mum, but lots of gardening with Purr. Grampie (Timmy) very anti catholic, so had to slide off to church in Buckingham and then go again to Lillingstone church with family - at one stage early on in relationship apprently Timmy making frightful rude comments about Catholics "bloody Papists" and that sort of thing, and finally Mum had to say well ho hum actually I am one - luckily Robartses v fond of her by then, so forgiven (not sure of real degree of anti-ness).

Learned to ride to join in - must have been after came back from Germany or during war at Lillingstone?

War: rationing but OK there as on Farm, lots of milk, eggs, butter etc. Granny had Jersey herd. Saw German planes en route to Coventry - could see London burning from there, ditto Coventry. Plane crashed nearby - saw parachutist

Built up devoted following among Lillingstone staff - all patently adored her.

Moo Robarts

Grizel married Lieutenant Colonel Anthony (Tony) Vere Cyprian Robarts DL, son of Capt Gerald (Timmy) Robarts and Ethel Florence Fletcher, on 22 Jul 1936 in Brompton Oratory. (Lieutenant Colonel Anthony (Tony) Vere Cyprian Robarts DL was born on 13 Sep 1910 in 10 Grosvenor Place, London and died on 26 Jun 1982.)